A Letter From A Young Person
'D' wanted to send a letter to those who cared for him during his time with Care Visions. He was supported to do so by one of the team. This is what he wanted to share.
A letter from D, and the replies
D came to live in one of our homes when he was 13. As he moved into his own flat, he wrote to the team who cared for him about what made the difference. Lee and Callum wrote back. We have anonymised his name to 'D' during the sharing of these letters.
to Care VisionsLLee
replying to DCCallum
replying to D
A letter to Care Visions
Written as he moved into his own flat
Coming to stay at Care Visions, when I was 13, was the first time I had stayed away from my family. Some of my brothers also went into care in different places. Things had been difficult at home and at school, though maybe people sometimes thought they were worse than they were.
I remember the day I left home. My whole family was there, including my grandparents. I was put in a car by a social worker. It was a long drive and I didn’t know where I was going. I was separated from my family and had no phone and, at the beginning, only saw family occasionally. Then covid came and meeting up with family was not possible. Sometimes, meeting up with family was in a sterile room. It was difficult to enjoy that.
After it was clear I would be here for longer than a few weeks, a new school was arranged. It was difficult to go in midway through the year. It felt difficult for me as a practical learner. I was on a reduced timetable and struggled. Outdoor education was good for me, though. My friend told me that his guidance teacher told him not to hang about with me, because I was in care. That was difficult for me.
In the end, coming to Care Visions was a really good thing. I had really good relationships with workers. Lee, Megan, Natalie and Heather were there for me from the start. I put a lot into those relationships too. There were other kids that I got on really well with.
I had some difficult experiences of other young people being here, too. It’s not their fault, but seeing the house get damaged, sometimes staying in my room when things were difficult, wasn’t always great for me. I always understood that, if things like that were happening, the other young person must be going through a really difficult time. I got on really well with those people, and I am still in touch with some of them. Care Visions was usually good at managing those things, though.
Some kids had different struggles from me. Other kids had tougher times and struggled more. A lot of them are doing really well now. One of them seemed almost like another brother to me. Lee, Megan and others are still keeping in touch with him regularly. It’s so good to see that.
I went to college at 16 and loved it. I had been working on fixing and making bikes for a year. It showed me that I could be good at these things and I decided that I wanted to become a mechanic. College was a gamechanger for me when it came to learning. Kirsten found my apprenticeship for me. She was always on the ball. She was great. Most of the team helped me with learning to drive too.
It’s the relationships I have made with the carers that have made things work out so well. Lee, Megan and Heather have been around from the start. I put a lot into those relationships too. I think I have been really settled here and have been very relaxed. I’m quite a relaxed guy.
It’s the relationships I have made with the carers that have made things work out so well.
There are also carers who used to work here who want to keep in touch with me and that was really good to hear, too. I would say that this house is a really good place to be. It has worked really well for me. Everyone has been there for me.
My gran and grandad did a lot for me. They were like my mum and dad. How you have been brought up makes a difference. They are getting old now and can’t travel much, so getting my driving licence has been great for that. I can go and see them whenever I want.
Getting your driving licence is the biggest thing you can do. You won’t realise until you have done it. There’s no limit to what you can do. It’s great for seeing your family and friends. Natalie helped me get some money to help me do that. Having a job helped too. I really wanted it too and worked hard to achieve it.
D’s messages
What he’d like the people around young people in care to hear.
For residential workers
It’s important to always put effort into building relationships, even when the person isn’t taking to you. Take your time. Learn what they like and adapt to that. The best thing you can do is learn what they like to do and try to join in and try to get to know them that way, because they might let you in if you adapt to what they like. I’m quite easy, though. I’ll do anything! Doing activities together and spending time together is important. I’ve been able to go to football games, because Daryl got tickets for us. He has left, but I’m still in contact with him.
For social workers
Try to get involved more. I feel like social workers are often in the background. I had so many social workers over the years. It’s hard to build a relationship when that happens. One of the big things is getting to know each person. If you don’t do that, that kid is not going to get to know you. I had quite a few social workers and I only saw them occasionally. Every kid should mean something to you. I know it is difficult, but it’s important to visit regularly. I sometimes felt failed by social work and social workers. After I was sixteen, I sometimes felt like they were pushing for me to move out.
For young people
My experience was that people looking after me wanted to make my life better and help me to achieve my dreams.
Try to stick in at school, but I know it’s really difficult. If you are a practical learner, like me, there might not be many options for your education, but PE and outdoor education were good for me. It’s really hard to know what you want to do at a young age.
When the team found the bike project for me (I think it was Lee) that really helped me to work out what I wanted to do.
What’s next?
I think I’ll keep in touch with lots of people from here after I leave. A lot of the people here are like family to me, and I’m the same to them. It’s like I’m part of their family.
Friends are really important. You learn a lot from friendships. I had a few friends before I came here, but I made more friends here. I know a lot of people, but I have a few really important friends, people who are really important to me.
I remember going away. It wasn’t a great experience, especially going somewhere far away. It was a tough time, but I came out the other end. It’s not all down to the people looking after me. It’s also about your mindset. You have to be reliable and work hard. In some ways, it could have been good to go back home, but my life is here now.
It was a tough time, but I came out the other end.
I don’t have any sense that Care Visions could have done anything better than they did. I had a really good experience at Care Visions. Everyone has always done their best for me and people have created opportunities for me, to get my apprenticeship, to get my driving licence. That has really helped me to flourish and to get on as well as I have. Without that, I might not be in the place I am today.
There have been lots of people here who have been important to me. Maybe Lee, Megan and Callum in particular. Callum has been a bit like an older brother to me. We have done lots of things together and he got me into going to the gym, which has been life-changing for me. Natalie was really important to me too, and she still is, in a different way now. Everybody has done their best for me, and I really admire that about them.
I’m really excited to have a place of my own now and to see what’s next for me. It’s great that it’s quite nearby, and that I’ll still be in touch with people from my Care Visions house.
D
The replies
Lee and Callum, two of the people D named in his letter, wrote back to him.
From Lee
Replying
Dear D,
It’s hard to believe that we’ve reached this moment.
You moved into our home in May 2019, and although I was on holiday when you arrived, I remember meeting you just three days later as if it were yesterday. You had been out buying things for your bedroom with one of your carers. You walked through the door, looked at me with that shy smile and simply said, “Hi Lee, it’s nice to meet you.” It was such a small moment, but one I’ve never forgotten. Even then, despite being understandably nervous, you could see how kind and caring you were, and how open you were to letting people into your life.
When you first arrived, you were scared. You’d heard so many frightening stories about what living in care would be like, and understandably you carried those fears with you. Looking back now, I wish you could have seen then what I can see now—that this would become your home, a place filled with love, laughter and people who genuinely cared about you, and that those carers would become family.
Like many teenagers, school wasn’t where you wanted to be. If you weren’t there, you were usually on your Xbox playing Fortnite. I’d never picked up a games controller in my life, but I learned to play because I wanted to spend time with you and get to know you in a way that mattered to you. All these years later, I’m still playing Fortnite because of you.
One of my favourite memories is when you saved up your pocket money to buy me my very first Fortnite skin. I remember speaking to my Natalie because I didn’t feel right accepting it—you’d worked so hard to save that money and I wanted you to spend it on yourself. But it meant so much to you that I had it, and that gift has always represented so much more than a skin on a game. It represented your kindness and your huge heart.
I’ll never forget the pandemic either. Sitting around the dining table helping you with your maths homework while the whole country was locked down. Then, once we’d finished, you disappeared to break every lockdown rule by going to kiss your girlfriend! To this day you still remind me that you did your homework before you went, and somehow that sums you up perfectly. You always wanted to do the right thing. You wanted guidance. You wanted someone to believe in you, and you always tried your best, even when you got things wrong.
You were also one of the most honest people I’ve ever met. Even on the rare occasions you tried to hide something, your face gave you away every single time. All I ever had to say was, “tell me that with a straight face,” and we’d both know the truth.
Then there was the time you offered to clean my new car. You spent ages trying to make it perfect, only to use a metal skewer on my black alloy wheels and scrape the paint off them! I couldn’t even be annoyed because you were only trying to do something kind for me. That was you all over—you always wanted to make other people happy.
You’ve always loved cars, so watching you pass your driving test, become a full-time mechanic, and be the very first young person I’ve cared for to get a van and move yourself into your own flat made me prouder than I can ever put into words. Seeing you drive away wasn’t sad—it was everything we’d all hoped for. It was proof of just how far you’d come.
I’ll always remember taking you to the dentist too. It was my day off, but there was nowhere else I wanted to be because I knew how big that day was for you. I even had a tear in my eye as you were put to sleep because that’s the relationship we’d built. Then you woke up from the anaesthetic and confidently told the dentist they needed to sober you up because you were driving me home. You were only fourteen! It still makes me laugh.
You taught me plenty over the years too. You taught me how to play Fortnite, although I still haven’t forgiven you for trying to convince me that mashed potatoes and salad cream belong together!
When I think about your journey, I honestly couldn’t be prouder. The quiet little boy who arrived believing care would be somewhere to fear became the young man who left school with over 95% attendance after once attending less than 10% of the time. You earned an apprenticeship, built a career as a mechanic, and drove yourself to your own beautiful flat. The fact that you’ve chosen to build your future here in Fife because this is where your little extra family is says everything about the relationships you’ve built along the way.
Some of my happiest memories aren’t the big milestones but the moments where you simply became part of my own life too. Having you at my 30th birthday with my family meant more than you’ll probably ever know. Taking you to your first wedding, all suited and booted, felt like watching someone I’d known all my life experience another important first.
Of course, it wasn’t always easy. We walked through some incredibly difficult days together. Thank you for trusting me enough to let me stand beside you through those moments. It has genuinely been one of the greatest privileges of my life, and if you ever needed me again, I’d do it all over without hesitation.
As you step into this next chapter, I hope life continues to be as bright as it looks today. I also hope you find a lovely girlfriend who’ll finally make your bed so I don’t have to keep reminding you!
More than anything though, I hope you never forget how much you’re worth. I hope you always remember how kind, caring and loving you are, and that you deserve every good thing life has to offer.
You will always be part of my family. You were genuinely loved every single day you lived in our home, and that love doesn’t stop because you’ve moved into your own home. Home isn’t a building, and family isn’t defined by blood. They’re built through love, trust and showing up for each other, every single day. Thank you for allowing us to love you, and for becoming such an important part of our lives.
Home isn’t a building, and family isn’t defined by blood.
I’ll always be here for you. I’ll always be proud of you. And I will continue to stand beside you and advocate for you for as long as I live.
I love you very much. Thank you for letting me be part of your story.
Love always,
Lee xx
From Callum
Replying
Hi D,
Three years ago, I met you for the first time at McDonald’s during my young person’s interview. If someone had told me then the impact you would have on my life, I don’t think I would have believed them. Watching you grow over the last three years has been one of the greatest privileges of my career. You have gone from a young person who struggled to find your own voice to a confident, thoughtful, and well-rounded young man whose energy, humour and personality brighten every room you walk into. Every challenge you have faced has helped shape the person you are becoming, and you should be incredibly proud of yourself.
To know that I played even a small part in that journey is something I will always be grateful for, and it will undoubtedly remain the highlight of my time with Care Visions. The relationship we’ve built has grown into something that goes far beyond the role of support worker and young person. I’ve genuinely gained a little brother. You have taught me as much as I could ever have taught you, and I’ll always be proud of the young man you have become. I have no doubt you’ll continue to achieve great things, and I can’t wait to see where life takes you next.
I’ve genuinely gained a little brother.
I hope you never lose the qualities that make you who you are. Keep believing in yourself, because you’re capable of far more than you sometimes realise. Stay kind, stay true to yourself. There will always be challenges along the way, but you’ve already shown that you have the strength to overcome them.
Thank you for trusting me, for making me laugh and for letting me be part of your journey. Watching you grow into the young man you are today has been an absolute privilege, and I’ll always be proud of you. No matter where life takes you next, I’ll always be in your corner, cheering you on. Remember you’ll always have a brother in me, and I’m grateful that through all of this, I got another one in you too.
Lots of love
Callum x